Yesterday, I opened my mailbox to a sweet surprise….. my P31 Woman Magazine had arrived. If you are familiar with the magazine, it is published by Proverbs 31 Ministries. It is chopped full of articles written by ladies for ladies. It is a great magazine that I recommend.
It is always a good day not to receive bills in the mail but today was especially exciting. My dear friend, Melanie Chitwood, graced the front cover. Her newest book What a Wife Needs from Her Husband was recently launched and the article was written what she is an expert in….. marriage.
In her article, Protecting the Oneness of Marriage, she discussed Matthew 19:6:
“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” (NAS)
God’s word says that when a couple marries, they have become “one flesh.” It is His intention for couples to know each other in intimacy in all areas: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. The intimacy is what holds the marriage together.
Melanie points out that as wives we have certain responsibilities to insure the oneness of marriage will succeed.
1. Priorities: Do we really put our husbands on the top of our priority list? I realize that , we wives, are busy doing everything. Jobs, kids, housework, and activities can be become our main focus and well…. hubby gets put on the back burner.
When Mark and I were newlyweds, my grandmother made it a point to advise two things:
a. Always have dinner together as a family….. In her words, “by 5:30, dinner on the table.”
b. Always ask about his day.
And my mother advised: c. Spend an hour together each day….alone. We have always put out kids to bed early then spent the rest of the night together. It is OUR time together.
2. Your Heart: Melanie points out that we must have God as our “first commitment” and then our husbands. We need that personal relationship with God in order for Him to show us what is keeping us from a close personal relationship with our husbands. We should check our hearts for disappointments, frustrations, bitterness, unforgiveness, and harshness towards our husbands. Allow God to clean out our junked up hearts to let our marriage grow.
3 Your Thoughts: I know this has happened to me…..Mark uses “that tone” and then I spend hours rehashing “that tone.” If I allow those rehashing thoughts rule, Mark and I would be doomed. Those thoughts need to be communicated through God’s love and banished before I think them. I have to face the truth: I am a sinner by nature and so is Mark. We are no way perfect.
4. Your words: And this doesn’t necessarily mean to our husbands but rather about our husbands. When you are around your girlfriends and the hubby bashing begins…. do you join? What image are you portraying? Do your kids hear your criticism or your loving thoughts?
Just the other day, Mark was a Watch Dog Dad at our son’s school. He was warmly welcomed by the office staff. The assistant principal told him that she thought I was a special mom because I have lunch every Friday and volunteer to teach sign language to a couple of classes each week. His response was, “I am very lucky to have Regina.” And you know what… when I arrived to eat lunch with our little guy, the assistant principal made it a point to tell me……Made me feel so warm and fuzzy….. but my response was, “no, I am the lucky one.”
5. Your actions: Are you a servant towards your husband? Do you do little things that show how much you love him? Jesus laid his life down to show His love…..do you have the “it’s all about me” attitude or do you truly show him the love you feel?
Melanie’s article made me stop and really think about my marriage. AND her advice is dead on!!! I have added her books to my library and you can always get some great advice on marriage at her website as well.
May God bless you and your marriage today…….
Inspiring Text
